COURAGE

“Be strong and bold; have no fear or dread of them, because it is the Lord your God who goes with you;

he will not fail you or forsake you.” – Deut. 31:6

I sat to pray and talk to God this morning.  Man, my heart is so full right now.  Full with worry, excitement, impatience, desire, frustration, ideas, heartache, Vision.  SO much of me right now wants to just lay down and rest. To STOP. Everything. Except Judy and the kids. I just want all the time and energy I have to go there. But I feel the drive, the pull, to our Wild at Heart trip for men in November, to a Vision of the ranch, to our growing online business, to building a true community, to getting in top physical shape.  So deep.  I feel God’s call to all of it.  I love it.  It’s incredible to be tapped into that wellspring.  But, like hypothermia, as the cold drains strength, the desire becomes strong to just lay down and rest.  Give up and give in. But give in to what?  The slumber is the kiss of death.   It’s a resignation.  A false contentment.  Dispassionate and apathetic.   It is a giving of life over to death.  And like the hypothermic slumber, life can go cold.  We fall asleep.  We become falsely content with chasing mediocrity.  There is a strong likelihood that we haven’t actually ever been really awake.  Or we’ve known moments of “awake-ness” but haven’t had the strength or the people around us to maintain it.  So we long to go back to sleep.

Like Cypher in “The Matrix”.  He was wakened by Morpheus and was called into a titanic struggle for the hearts and minds of other people.  Their mission, as a crew, was to pull people out of the Matrix and invite them into a real existence, in a community that was truly alive.  But Cypher became jaded.  Watch the clip in the sidebar to the right.  Or click here to watch it on YouTube.

Surrounded by wine, steak and a fine cigar, Cypher makes a deal to go back to sleep.  “I don’t want to remember nothing.  NOTHING.  You hear me?”

Let the Matrix take over again.

But I can’t.  (Actually, I can.  You can too.)  We can choose sleep.  (In fact, we need to choose rest.  But they are two different things.)  We can choose mediocrity.  We can choose all those things that we think give us life but actually keep us asleep.

Grandfather spoke about those things that stir our hearts awake to the reality of an unseen and eternal life.  From his native language to English, he translated it as “Inner Vision” or “The Voice of God”.  He said the Voice of God gives us Vision for our lives, our true purpose.  And then he said:

“A person who is not living their Vision is living death.”

And I remember.  I begin to remember why I can’t fall asleep.  Because it would mean death.  It would mean ignoring Vision.  It would mean ceasing to live for others.  Death by selfishness.  Death by numbness.  Death by mediocrity.

I can’t do it.  I won’t do it.

One foot in front of the other.  Stay awake.  Stay alert for the needs of others and rise up to meet them.  Fight.  Live.  Pray.  Listen.  Laugh.  Love.  And wake up the next morning to do it again.

RED BLUE ORANGE BLACK GREEN PURPLE

YELLOW PINK RED BROWN BLUE YELLOW

I love this. Here is your job: name the colors of the following words. Do NOT read the words…rather, say the color of the words. For example, for the word BLUE, you should say “RED”. Say the colors as fast as you can.

Messed up huh? Yeah. Me too. Check out this link. You can run a timer game and see how long it takes you to read the words and then a second time of how long it takes you to say the colors. My first times were 10 seconds (just reading) and 31 seconds (saying colors).

If I just relaxed and looked at the words like shapes instead of letters and I tuned out the “reading” part of my brain, I could really start to cruise. But as soon as I saw letters, that’s it, I fumbled. I stuttered. Like a real brain fart style stutter. I’d say the first sound of a word four times and it felt like I was doing my best “Rain Man” impression. I looked ridiculous! But then I took another deep breath, relaxed and just saw the colors and said them. Easy.

God is that simple. And that complex. Look at God today. And instead of saying “God”. Say His color. And let the color be His will for your life. Relax. Breathe. Yes.

Going where called.
Doing what is asked.

Doug

I’m sorry.

I forgive you.

I love you.

Thank you.

There will be times in your life, and yet in my future, when living fully alive will hurt.  Many of you have already suffered this.  You have suffered betrayal, physical affliction, character assassination and sleepless nights.  You have walked dark and lonely roads.  Some of you are walking this even now.  It is a direct result of bringing the life and glory of God alive in you, to a world in need.  This life and glory is fiercely opposed, both by the world and by the realm just beyond our physical senses (more on that another time).  Still others have suffered in these ways and you have not yet discovered the weight and the glory of your life.  You pursue it and it so often feels like something just outside your reach.  And, there are those of you reading this who are, honestly, still asleep.

Eighteen months ago, I was fully engaged in life, living free, living alive.  In the course of living alive, I suffered a devasting double-ankle injury.  Only in the past few months have I become aware of how much damage was done.  However, last summer, in the deepest part of hurt and questioning, two dear friends prayed with me and woke me up to the life I had lost and how to get it back.  I am so deeply and forever grateful to these two men.  (Mike and Morgan, thank you, truly).  It was in the morning summer storms of the Colorado Rockies that I wrote this.  For the first time, I recognized the depths of the Book of Psalms in the Bible.  As I sat under the eaves of my cabin, at sunrise, my gratefulness, God’s power and my transformation showed up in these storms.

I share it with you, especially as you battle the wounds of living.  I pray there’s blessing in it for you.

Truly,

Doug

***************

My King and my Lord.  The morning thunder echoes with your might.

Swift and bright, the lightning cuts the sky and does justice to your majesty.

You have felled my enemies.

Those who would sabotage me, clung to my back and refused to lift their claws.

Yet you, you placed your warriors on my right and my left.  Their swords ring out with your truth and my enemies fall.

Those who would destroy me,  broke my legs and felled me in battle.  They feasted on my home and all seemed lost.

Yet you, you sent your swordsmen and archers to me on swift and bright wing.  On my right and on my left you placed them.  On their lips they bore the words of your healing.

On the fallen bodies of my enemy, you rain pellets of ice after days of battle.  In the early morning, storms of your glory pass over the fields.

You make known to the mountains that you are the King of Glory and my heart sings as your steward.

I look out my window on the foggiest morning of the Winter. The meadow is shrouded in a veil of mist. The frozen moisture holds on to each twig, blade of grass and spider web.

As I sat in prayer this morning in the woods, in the grey light of pre-dawn, I could hear the rustling of the snowshoe hare under the willows. The boughs of the black spruce tree hung just above my wool cap, each of them detailed with a fine frost. From one icy needle hung an invisible thread of a spiders web, left over from the warm days of late Autumn. On the very end was suspended a treasure to put the finest jeweler to shame. The strand of silk was collecting crystals of its own. A feather of frost, nary the size of snowflake, drifted and floated in the cool drafts of the East breeze. Before my eyes hung the fragility of Creation we so often hear of. With a warm breath, the passing of a sparrow or a sudden gust of wind, this suspended gem would be gone. It won’t be there when I return tomorrow. I will never see its uniqueness again. There will be other wonders, other marvels. But none the same. As it is with the rest of Creation; humans, animals, plants. We must evaluate each act as life-giving or life-taking.

Were my words in that conversation life-giving or did they destroy a piece of that person?

Is my lifestyle making this world a better place for my children’s grandchildren?

Does my family know I love them? What have I done this week to restore myself?

Have I gazed upon the face of my children with the same awe and wonder as this moment?

With the flick of a switch, the utterance of a word, the toss of a wrapper, this suspended gem could be gone.

It won’t be there when we return tomorrow. Let no moment pass with lack of attention to the detail that was poured into it at the time of Creation.

Going where called,
Doing what is asked,

Doug

Good morning! Oh my Lord. There is SO much in my little ol’ pea brain right now! Right now, I wanted to share with you that if your group, company, church or other organization is in need of some renewal, focus, vision or bonding, Judy and I are available for a very limited number of speaking and facilitation engagements in the next year!

We want to hear from you and see if there is a place we can serve you and your mission. From one hour consultations to three day retreats.

Please contact us and book early!

We can cover any number of topics. Have a look around the blog and you’ll get an idea of our vision and mission.

E-mail me at intothewilderness@gmail.com.

Looking forward!

Doug and Judy

I know (KNOW!) that this title got you curious. Part of you said “EWWW…no way! I do NOT want to know!” But a part of your brain, tucked backed in the primitive recesses of your ancestral urgings forced your finger to click on the link to find your way here. Perhaps it wasn’t even completely conscious but suddenly, you found yourself staring at this potentially scandalous post.

Yes, I know. Six kids. Who’s got time to talk?!

Well, Judy and I do. And it’s the nights where we put sleep off just a little longer so we can share some of our deepest thoughts from the day.

And the other night was just such a night.

I couldn’t even tell you the context of the conversation or what it was all about. But I know we were talking about the grind of day to day life and the choices we get to make. Sometimes those choices, while completely ours, we make them nearly unconsciously. Or we make them in such a fit of frenzied activity that we give them little attention.

We choose how we react to the latest cup of spilled milk. We choose to spend our evening surfing Crackbook. We choose anger over patience. We choose hurried-ness over attentiveness. We spend a large portion of our day choosing by reaction rather than decision.

And it was in the midst of this conversation that Judy dropped this one simple statement.

“How we live our days is how we live our lives.”

And it hung there in the air. Like a delicate down feather. Perfectly quiet and yet full of presence.

And at the end of our lives, we have all lived them one day at a time.

I’m going to go give my kids a real kiss goodnight.

For you all,

Doug and Judy

(My wife is a wise women. She is a blessing to me, day in and day out.  I love you Judy.)

What the world needs now is love, sweet love.

It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of.

- Jackie de Shannon, 1965

Love?  Is that what’s needed?

Or maybe we need more time?  What’s the most common response I hear when I ask someone how they’re doing?  (Well, first on the list would be “Fine.”)  But a close second and moving up is “I’m so busy”.  And it’s said with an exhausted sigh.  We must need more time.

Wait.  It’s obvious.  The world needs God.  That’s the right answer isn’t it, for a question on a “religion” blog?  God.  Must be it.

No.  No, wait.  I’ve been in L.A. three days now and, honestly, it’s a little disconcerting.  Our brothers and sisters in the U.S. are getting slammed by this recession.  And it’s getting worse.  There is no pocket of conversation that doesn’t somehow reference the economy.  I’ve attended five speakers sessions so far and without exception, each presenter has referenced the economy and the hardships that are here and the ones yet to come.  The world, obviously, needs money.

Is that it?

Love.  Money.  Service.  Motivation.  God.  Community.  Time.

None of these.  (Nope, not even God actually.)

I ached over this question today as I sat beneath a massive palm tree.  (In plain sight but completely invisible to the crowds just five feet from my toes.)  The world needs something.  People need something.  I kid you not.  There is alot of pain here right now.  I woke up to it in a way I hadn’t before.  Likely because now, it’s my neighbor suffering.  It’s my friend losing his job.  It’s my colleague losing her husband.

And I know exactly what the world needs.

This world needs you.  YOU!  And it needs all of you.  You are holding back.  I AM HOLDING BACK!  We cannot hold back any piece of our truest selves from the world any longer.  This world needs you to be actively seeking out your truest self, the truest and fullest person God created you to be.  And that’s where God comes in.  It’s God’s cry for you.  The tears God sheds for you are for the beautiful parts of yourself that have been taken away and buried by the pain of life, the difficulties you’ve endured.  Oh, the world needs God alright, but God coming in the form of YOU COMING FULLY ALIVE and reaching out to the people around you.  When this happens, when each of us comes fully alive, we will give and the world will get exactly what it needs.  The world needs YOU to make GOD real.

I love this journey.  I don’t want to fall asleep for a single step of it.  I don’t want to miss a single pebble on the path or the slightest whisper on the wind.  And I don’t want you to miss it either.  You….are….needed.

All of me.

For all of you.

With Him.

Doug

To all my friends, my allies, my most loved,

Over the years, I’ve been blessed with so many incredible lessons and countless teachers who brought those lessons to me. My struggle has always been to filter through all of them, find the most true and profound and (this is the hardest part) live them and make them manifest in my life. Can I share with you the ones I have found to be most true and profound, not only in my story but in the stories you have shared with me?

1. Smile. Smile incessantly. It will catch people’s attention. It will lift your spirit and theirs. And it will make them wonder what you are up to.

2. Cry. Cry when you feel it. Please don’t hold that back. Your tears have blessed me in countless ways. I hope mine have done the same for you.

3. Sit in silence everyday. Once in the morning and once at night, if you can. But at least ten minutes, in silence, in the same place, everyday. Near a window that looks outside. This one single act will change your life.

4. When you wake up in the morning, maybe while you drive or ride, ask God this question: “Lord, where do you need me today?” Then, listen quietly. Maybe for, oh I don’t know, ten minutes?

5. Say thank you quietly. What are you thankful for today?

6. Say thank you out loud. Who would you like to say thank you to today?

7. Drink lots of water. And if you do it in the form of green tea, even better.

8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like prince and dinner like a peasant.

9. Affirm someone whom you know needs it and someone that you think doesn’t.

10. Waste time with people. The greatest gift you can give someone is your unscheduled, agenda-less time. You will show them their worth far more than you could ever tell them. (Thank you Sister Vicki!)

11. In the crises that invariably join us on our journey, ask this question. “In ten years, will this really matter.” The crises will either slip away quietly into memory or you will realize a strength in you that you are only beginning to become friends with.

12. Forgive those who have hurt you before you feel like it. They need it more than you do.

Thank you all, for being a part of my story. However that has happened, I am grateful for you all.

In the Kingdom,

Doug